The Advent

Yes, it's the first of December and the first snowfall of the season!
As my Dad and i were driving home from my Grandparents' house Sunday night we passed house after house lit up by Christmas lights. It got me thinking about what this season has been turned into. What should be a joyous, miraculous, and unselfish time is now stressful, chaotic, and greedy.

Year after year at my church I'm told the story of the very first Christmas- Jesus' birth. I think, though, that this year is going to mean more to me than previous years. As I watch the news and see how the world is changing, in not so good ways, and as my own family and friends become burdened with problems of their own, I'm constantly reminded of the reason Jesus was put on this earth.

^{Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV)
28}"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ²⁹Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. ³⁰For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Yes, it's a verse about the cross and all the sins that Jesus drank up and took away from us. But it just reminds me to rejoice and celebrate this Christmas because if He wasn't born, He wouldn't have done what He did.
Please don't make this Christmas just another shopping extravaganza and irksome time-make it meaningful.

not just a song

like a bird in the wind

like a sail on the sea

I'm in love, i give in

oh Lord take control of me

Isaiah Six; In The Wind

There Will Be Light

God does not leave his children without
light.
He saw that light was good, and so he
keeps
the silver lamp of stars lit in the night,
The moon's soft radiance while mankind sleeps.
Never a cloud so dense but some faint ray
Marks where the sun moves out beyond the dark;
And i have found that never a night or day,
If i but search, there is some little spark
Of brilliance permeating any fog:
some home-sweet lamp set on a heavenly sill,
A searchlight lifting through the city's smog,
A guiding beacon glowing on a hill.
"Let there be light- and there was light." O men,
Even in this dark hour there is a light
Waiting beyond the clouds to shine again:
The lifted lamp of God, full-orbed and bright,
Still burns despite our anxious fears and doubt,
A light that never will be blackened out.

page 14 of Journey Into Dawn by Grace Noll Crowell

Psalm 33:4-7

For the word of the Lord is right and true;
he is faithful in all he does.
The Lord loves righteousness and justice;
the earth is full of his unfailing love.

By the word of the Lord were the heavens made,
their starry host by the breath of his
mouth.

He gathers the waters of the sea into jars;
he puts the deep into storehouses.

i've never had all the answers

this is one of those times i wish that i had a lap top just so i could sit in my room in the dark -- really trap my emotions and thoughts.
why is it that people go through so many feelings in one day? at one point we're happy, and then we think too much and we're sad...feeling useless or just pointless. what is this life anyway?...i find myself wondering that a lot, listening to that song by Chantal Kre...something or other...
the truth is that people have expectations, fair and unfair. people have wants, and then people just dont care at all. Friends drift away, and others come closer. No matter how many times i think it over, most of that doesnt really matter too much. I still wanna go somewhere, start over, and be free to be who i want- no expectations, no old life, just new.
i have so many questions for this life...like why am i afraid, yet excited at the same time? why do i want to start over when it's not like i have many regrets? i have so much that God has been so gracious to give me even though i dont deserve it and yet i pick out all the things that i could possibly trip over.. and i trip over them...figuratively speaking...
i was thinking about this the other day, like how if someone were to draw my life out on a beach: Jesus and i would be walking together and then i would just run away...more like drive right into the ocean and drown, or right into a pile of rocks and flip over- crash- burn.

no one really likes feeling like this anyways

see ya

This Summer is Still so Young

SUMMER IS HERE
okay, just had to get that out there :)

I'm so excited about being able to do the things i couldnt during the school year. My friend and i made a list of all the things we want to do before summers end. Why is it that i'm more exhilarated and motivated at the beginning of summer than i am on New Years eve which is supposed to be "the beginning....a way to start over"?
It's probably the warm breeze and sunshine, the walks taken in barefeet with doggies :), catching up with old friends...or meeting new ones. The possibilities are endless. Probably the only disappointment someone could have would be summer not living up to their potential.
So i start here:
whats the weather supposed to be like today? A high of 73 and partly cloudy...
what music should i listen to this morning? Keith Urban
plans for today? small group later and whatever else i feel like doing......


p.s. photo by yours truly :)

There's a Light in the Dark Where the Sky Splits Apart

Wanna fly through the blue bay on the bottom with you
getting lost in the waves, let the world slip away
when nobody can find us, i don't wanna be safe
leave it all behind us, make an escape

You're my silver lining covered in gold
tell me what am i feeling
well, it's hard to explain
like underwater breathing, swimming in rain



and im standing still
but i can't catch my breath
or running fast as i can
but going no where
where do i go from here

Marie Digby